Tag: csi: crime scene investigation

that was a LOT of bestiality

that was a lot of dead dogs holy shit

I’m not sure what I hated about this episode most. The camera work, the dialogue, the scene direction, or the acting direction. I absolutely understand why Gary Dourdan had ‘creative differences’ after Tarantino and then this episode.

I hate stunt director episodes.

Somehow this episode gave me one of my biggest crushes (Warrick) topless and just made me feel gross instead.

Also… was he roofied and raped? What the hell was that.

A Lab Rats episode! All of the Lab Rats were my favourites. All of them. But especially Archie. Archie Kao was so damn funny.

That episode was a delight, I really enjoyed when CSI did comedy.

Archie muttering ‘thank you for at least getting me justice’* angrily at Nick and Warrick and only getting a ‘sure! You’re welcome!’ was the highlight.

But! I just finished the Ted Danson years and by that point only Henry and Hodges are left. So it was great seeing Bobby, Archie, Wendy, and Mandy again.

*not exact quote

I just skipped the Without a Trace crossover. Hopped on over.

Man, everyone in CSI has sex with their underwear on. Las Vegas: Land of the Never Nudes.

I am pretending the Warrick and drugs plot isn’t happening. I will close my eyes and let it pass through me.

W-why is this Ronnie Lake’s last credited episode? Oh. She’s FINE she just… goes away and they never mention her again. I guess I’m gonna assume she went to take on that horror movie career she was offered.

“We don’t talk about Ronnie.”

Orrrr she decided to cut contact after Sara’s ennui act. And became a horror film star. I’m not swaying from this horror film star idea. You were a shitty partner to Ronnie, Sara. You’re why she left for the silver screen.

Sara kissing Grissom and Hodges all ‘god I wish it were me’ (to be clear I absolutely mean he wants to be Sara) made me feel better about Hannah’s finding out after fucking around scene.

I was absolutely here for Dickie/Catherine. Gone out like Warrick, I guess.

I went back in time to season 8. I’m a few episodes in now. Warrick, my love.

Anyway, nothing turns your blood cold like seeing the date 2007 and the summary words “The hanging death of a possible hermaphroditic male”

I hope Henry and Nick drink when they remember what they said in this episode.

also ronnie’s neat i like ronnie

The TV movie that ended it! I see we’re already at sensitive depictions of other cultures.

I’m enjoying that Grissom’s reaction to leaving a desert city was to go live on the ocean and try to never step foot on scrub again. I wonder if he has nightmares about poker chips drowning him.

36 minutes in: Obscure South American drug flower for *mind control*.

40 minutes in: They set fire to Brass. Hasn’t this man been through enough.

End of Part 1: I don’t like the Lady Heather/Grissom things because the sexual politics of CSI confuse and scare me. Lady Heather is fine. Long pauses and cryptic phrases do not intellectual dialogue make. Makes a man whisper “oh please no”

Part 2:

Please leave Lady Heather alone, Sara. She’s going through a lot being stuck in CSI Las Vegas.

Stolen from IMDB:

Catherine Willows: Listen, I need a favor. The new girl, she’s having a bit of a rough one. She thinks she let you down. I was hoping you might be able to help her process the suitcase, give her a little of that Grissom TLC? She could really use it

Gil Grissom: I’d rather not. I’m quite content here. Where did that girl come from, anyway?

Catherine Willows: My vagina! You don’t recognize her? Grissom, that’s Lindsey, my daughter

 

Grissom teaching Lindsey rhymes and talking to bees has made Part 2 much more fun.

I enjoyed the painting of the bees.

27 minutes in: Oh no. It got dopey again. Catherine just screamed an ‘inspirational speech’ while I stared into the middle distance.

30 minutes in: oh no. Psychology. CSI-style.

34 minutes in: Jules deserved better.

38 minutes in: Long silences and cryptic statements taught Gil how to love, somehow.

41 minutes in: Seriously? This is Miss Piggy and Kermit all over again. Learn to love yourself, Mantis Queen. Make him serve you in the desert.

This is it, this is (most of) the end of my massive bingewatch (to my future self asking why I didn’t talk about the other episodes: I was very tired)

“Yes, I’m an insane serial killer and I’m getting tattoos to look like my dead twin who was my partner in serial killing but that doesn’t mean I can’t ALSO have an orgy with the tattoo artists while I’m at it. I’m a fun guy.”

This episode also features what seems to be the writers going through a forensics gadget catalog. Blood timing! Plant talking!  Running license plates! CPR! This is wild.

Zach Morris really must be using his time control powers to pull off these murders.

 

oh my god there was a picture of warrick in this episode. the lost csi. i miss him.

uh I guess jules is finito